Covid Chronicles – Part 5 and 6

Written on July 17^th, 2020 1 month after reopening measures begin in Ontario during the pandemic of COVID-19. This is a journal of my thoughts and feelings.

It’s sort of weird at this point, I’m not sure whether to even keep calling these Covid Chronicles. With everything reopening, it’s almost seems like people are over Covid? Which feels very weird for me because I do not feel over-it. I’m still scared, worried, constantly adjusting, and feel very hesitant to enjoy reopening.

This might be the first summer where I haven’t relished in it, I have even sort of wished it would go by a little faster just so that we can move closer to Covid becoming less of a thing, maybe closer to a vaccine (hopefully). Usually I feel much more sad to think summer is going by so quickly.

I am pushing myself to be present and enjoy the small respite that the summer is bringing with lower case loads and some things reopening that I feel safe to partake in. I’m enjoying the sun and warm weather when I can (although it has been WAY too hot where I live – global warming anyone?). Going through the drive through for donuts, walking in the park, going to the beach, dinners on the balcony.

I am conscious that things will probably get even harder again before they get better. A second wave will bring new challenges, and new loss. The winter will make socially distant visits harder and cause more isolation.

I am trying to find ways to squeeze out every bit of enjoyment I can now. A sense of vacation even without our normal vacation. I have this lingering sense of the calm before the storm hopefully this rest and some good times can help us push through whatever is to come in the fall.

My husband and I have 2-weeks off coming up in August and we’ve started a list of all the things we want to try to cram into those days. It’s helping me feel more excited and positive. It’s bringing me some escape which I think many of us have been desperately craving.

Written on July 27th , 2020 – below are photos taken on my trip to see my parents during the pandemic of Covid-19.

I got to see my parents for the first time since lockdown almost 5 months ago. I hadn’t been able to see them since Christmas.

I spent 4 days with them at their house, after a strict 2-week isolation period to try to make sure I wasn’t bringing anything with me other than my suitcases.

It was truly amazing getting to see them. I remember saying to my husband the night before I left, “I’m sad already because I know how fast it is going to go by. And I don’t know when we will be able to do this again”.

I always love getting to see my parents but this time did feel very different. We’d been apart for so long it was a pretty emotional reunion. I remember getting chocked up pulling into the driveway and hugging my Mom.

We fit a whole summer into that four days. We had a barbecue, we went on a hike, we went shopping, we went to the beach twice, and had 2 campfires.

We even went for a socially distant visit to my grandparents’ on their back deck. My Grammie and Boppa, as I call them, are 2 of my favourite people in the world. They’ve been through a lot of hardships in their life and have a way of always making you feel like we’ll all make it through somehow.

I was so worried before I left that I would somehow without knowing it bring the virus with me, that I would harm my parents or grandparents. But at the same time I realized they could catch it anyway just from going to the store, or they could get hurt some other normal way and I wouldn’t have gotten to see them. We just have to find ways to mitigate the risks enough to allow us to do the things that are really important in life.

Getting to see them, and getting to go to a different place for awhile really did make it feel for brief moments like there wasn’t a pandemic looming around us. They were 4 days of peace.

While we were driving in the car coming back from the beach,my step-dad said something like, “Summer is made up of 3 things: wind, water, and sun.” And the only thing I would add to that list is: trees, campfires, and time spent with our loved-ones.

Regardless of the circumstances that brought them, I will cherish those days together. I don’t know what the next few months hold for us, but I know those memories will carry us through.

Write soon,

Hannah B.L.